Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Blog Education

Phew..! Today has been a productive day biggrin As you can see, I have learnt how to install smileys on Blogger mrgreen Hehehehe! Serious lah, post ini akan penuh dengan smiley sebab saya jakun! It was a bit tough cause now I have to go back to Firefox but I don't really mind, Google Chrome has been crashing a lot lately. Besides, I get bored real fast so this is a refreshing change. razz

To find out how to put smileys in your blogger posts, click here. Credits to this person, though I don't know your name cause I just googled and you popped up. wink

Okay, so today me and my research partner, Soleha Adnan, finished analyzing our research data. Now, we only have to describe our findings, discuss them, give recommendations, update our literature, and our thesis will be done! mrgreen

Maybe I shouldn't use the word only. That's an understatement as it will take us at the very least 2 weeks to finish everything, and that is if we work super fast. Tomorrow we'll be seeing our supervisor and hopefully we can finish describing our data tomorrow and move on to the discussion. Here's what we did today :
This is our correlation table. Some sort of calculation to see the relationship between two situations. And if you're thinking I did any of the calculations, then you don't know me at all. My maths suck so much, I fear for patients under my care. Since doing all this research crap, I am just sooooooo in love with SPSS. Thank you creator of SPSS, whoever that may be.


Can I just take a moment here to say that I feel so grown up now that I see all these words and numbers and actually know what they mean? Teeehee wink

As you have probably noticed, I now also know how to print screen shots and link people. Yes, I'm slow but at least I got there. smile

I was texting Asrul earlier tonight and told him I was going to blog about what I'm going to do after graduation, but after all this blogging education, I think I'm too tired to think. Plus, he wants me to go through my plans with him first before I post them because he doesn't want to be the last to know.

Let's pause the happy tone for a moment. Sometimes, when I'm tired and cranky but still have to go through my "girlfriend duties" (which includes texting my every single move, going over to see his parents once in a while, socializing with his cousins, trying hard to care about everything he cares about, being present at all his futsal games, bringing over my cooking to him whenever I can, and well, so so much more), I grumble and a small part of me feels suffocated and wishes I could just have some time to myself.

But lately I realized something. He wants to text me all the time. He wants me to get to know his family. He wants to eat my cooking. He wants to be able to smile at me when he's on the futsal court. He wants to talk to me about the things he care about. In short, he loves me.

And here I am, grumbling because I'm hot, thirsty, tired, sleepy, bored, hungry, or just plain craving for all the things I can't have. So self-involved I was that I forgot he wants to do all that couple stuff because he loves me. And it's not just that. I want to do all that stuff for him too. It's just that, sometimes, I get stupid and grumpy and just want some time to myself. It doesn't mean that I don't love him. It means that sometimes, I want to love myself too.

But that's no excuse to tell him off when he calls to wake me up cause I've overslept. Yes, I think I've done that twice now. Ignored his texts and calls or I pick up just to say, "I want to SLEEP!!" and then hang up and then have no memory of doing all that when I've woken up.

Well you see, I think the devil sleeps with me. When I'm in that phase between sleep and consciousness but I'm not quite ready to wake yet, I get so mad if anything wakes me up (e.g., a grass cutter right outside my window, a loud car alarm going off, my actual alarm clock going off) and I'm sorry, when I'm in that phase I really just want to scream at anything that bothers me and I don't have a remember-that-I-love-you button.

I'm sorry for always breaking your heart with my evil twin's attitude sad

When I read my good friend Sai's blog post on lust vs. love, it got me appreciating my boyfriend so much because it made me realize that he really really loves me and there are men out there who are such scum, they treat women like sex objects and really, it's not very often that a girl comes across a man who really loves her, truly and sincerely.

I'm one of those lucky girls razz

Okay, this post is turning out to be twice the length I thought it would be. I'll post about my graduation plans some other time, okay? In the meantime, here's a video of the video game I'm about to play just as soon as I click on the publish post button mrgreen

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

thank you